advent windows, part 1

this december, i found myself longing to go deeper into advent this year, a longing to be pierced with christmas; to be fully aware and fully present to what the time held for my heart... so when i saw an eBook by the amazing mandy steward called "come thou long expected", i jumped on the opportunity! and i got even more than i bargained for. the journey was amazing, with daily "word" prompts for art journaling, combined with images and a few quotes each day... but the part that i didn't know i was getting myself into was the community... posting glimpses of our days on instagram (& now facebook, since i've joined "the art journaler" community officially), it was like we were walking together, affirming each other on the way. so good. so needed.

so my process involved altering a book and using the pages to "art journal". i'd read through and pick out a secret story just for my heart and where i was processing. this was my first time doing this daily, and i loved it. having this little ritual of choosing a word, opening myself to God in it as i began my day with a hot drink... i just might continue this forever.

 some favorite excerpts from my art journaling advent journey:

day 1: ASK
this first day, i found a growing awareness of my longings and my questions,
and that it is in the "not asking" that the "not receiving" comes

 

day 2: VISIT

day 3: BELIEVE
a day that i realized shame was a lie, despite what my soul often believes...
and the words on the page contained:

find
all at once, a broken wing
young hurt

day 4: SEARCH

found words on the page:

gaze
followed me
studying glassy eyes     inside
waited,
asked me my name

(and my answer was {sapphire}, a name given me by a lovely woman two years ago... so when i photographed the page, i did so with some tiny sapphires strewn across the page - a birthday gift to myself as i was looking to accept this name/identity)

also, as i was on my way to begin working on my journal page this day, i was driving toward the sunset, and had the distinct sense that i wanted to "chase the light", and when i came to the pages for the day, they were there:

chase light

day 5: EXPLORE; day 6: GIVE

it was amazing to me the difference between how my soul interpreted SEARCH and EXPLORE. i had them on two consecutive days, and SEARCH felt more stressful, shouldsy, like i'm failing if i haven't found it yet... whatever "it" is. SEARCHing implies that you know what you're looking for. then i got EXPLORE, and it felt like a {breath}. i felt free to wander, look around, find what i found, see what is... rather than try to force what is into the category of whatever it is i'm looking for... i spent this evening wandering around savers thrift store, EXPLORing colors and textures and patterns, which found their way into my journal page later

i love the words that found themselves in this final page

fresh sprawled
mighty
a lone woman
{warrior}